Forget

It has only been recently, as in the past few months, that I have realized what my greatest fear is. I used to think that it was being trapped, and though that continues to terrify me, there is one thing that takes precedence over it. My greatest fear is: forgetting. The thought that memories I once held dear and close will somehow be lost to me, it stops my heart. Donna once told me that if it is important enough, I won't forget, but I can't help thinking what will happen if I do. That's why I keep post-it notes from every day in my assignment books, why I have a drawer and a shelf full of old school things, notes I'll never read again gathering dust just in case.

What's funny though, I can't wait to leave and start over again with new friends. That's almost a contradiction to my fear, but at the same time it's not, because I'll still carry everything with me so I won't forget. I just want to start again. Is that terrible of me? to wish to let go of everyone?